Aging and Life Enhancement
By Kathryn Kilpatrick
Sometimes it takes only one act of kindness and caring to change a person’s life. ~Rosalynn Carter
When visits are in person with an older adult, occasionally or as part of providing care, they may eventually fall into old familiar patterns. Often, as an older adult’s abilities change, even previous activities may go by the wayside. There is something to be said about changing the options or making appropriate modifications that can enhance the experience for all involved. Knowing a person’s background, interests and any challenges can elevate the benefits of the connection but possibly with modifications to meet a person where they are in their aging journey.
During Covid restrictions, unfortunately, options for interactions were limited. All of this contributed over the months, in some cases, to increased cognitive decline of some older adults, in part, because of decreased engagement. Combining that with possible increased hearing, vision, memory, speech or other difficulties, sometimes visits became shorter or less frequent. When the television becomes the main focus or the visitors spend more time on their phones, the older adult loses out on the benefits of being engaged in a variety of experiences which is recommended for brain health.
If you take a moment to step back, perhaps there is something you can learn as to what it is they are trying to tell you, perhaps not in certain words but through their actions or lack of them. How can you be more present and create some meaningful time together? How can you meet them where they are in their journey?
In talking with a woman who had attended one of my presentations, we discussed some ideas to consider as visits in person started to increase during Covid restrictions. She came up with an idea that she felt her husband would enjoy. She found online videos from some of the countries and places they had visited overseas. It became one of their favorites as they shared remembrances during their visits. He definitely preferred this to some of the mundane activities they were doing before. This is not an activity he could do on his own but with his wife handling the technology, making sure they had a larger screen and increased volume, this activity grew to her also finding a fun video to watch during subsequent visits.
Certainly, if someone is facing changes in speech, memory or hearing, there will need to be modifications. Where to start? Each friend or family member may have a different connection with an older adult. Do an inventory of shared interests then think about how it could be modified, if needed.
During the years in my home health career as a speech-language pathologist, this was an important aspect in my treatment plan. Activity modifications that were suggested to families/caregivers depended on the residual abilities of my patient, along with interests and abilities of the support system.
Many older adults may be unable to read novels anymore, but staying engaged is important. Instead of novels, one client found reading Chicken Soup for the Soul stories about pets enjoyable and easier to follow. Stories were shorter and had larger print. That created some conversation starters between her and the caregiver because they both loved cats. Maybe details were missing in the story but it did not matter. It became one of their regular activities and some family members found similar possibilities. Another person might have preferred someone to read the story instead. It is important to modify rate/volume while not expecting a recap of details or asking specific questions.
Another modification was made when one client gave up reading because he was frustrated since he kept losing his place frequently. Instead of using his finger to point, he was given a larger plain index card to place under each line as he read. It took some getting used to, but it helped him keep his place and he resumed reading more for pleasure.
Enhancing engagement comes down to building on things of interest, and making modifications if/when needed. Sharing what you have learned can also help others better know how to create not only positive but varied interactions with an older friend or family member.
It is one of the beautiful compensations of life that no man can sincerely try to help another without helping himself. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
