A bowl of whipped cream. That’s all it took to catapult my grandfather to the top of the Most Fun Grandparent list.
I was six. A big man with a jaunty auburn toupee, Poppop asked my cousin and me what our favorite food was. “Whipped cream,” we said. He pulled out a box of Dream Whip and minutes later, we were at the kitchen table with spoons and bowls of whipped cream. Nothing’s ever tasted better.
Being a fun grandparent comes naturally to some people. For others, it’s learned. Daily bowls of whipped cream and piles of gifts aren’t the key to light-hearted grandparenting. As with most things, too much of anything is just too much, says Judith Macek, a licensed professional clinical counselor in Portage County.
“Balance indulgence; too much teaches them that the world revolves around them and it doesn’t and that leads to disappointment in adulthood. You want to respect the parents’ values,” she says.
Overindulgence aside, fun grandparenting is a good fit for many. Grandparents, free from the day-to-day obligations of parenting, have more time to play and explore, Macek says.
A Do-Over
Time, which most parents have in short supply, is a gift for grandparents.
“There’s not as much laundry, mess or tasks when kids aren’t living in your home. As grandparents, you kind of go with the flow. It comes more naturally because, for most of us, we tend to relax more as we get older. We don’t have to keep schedules like parents do.” Macek says.
“Grandparenting can be an opportunity for a do-over, learning ways to appreciate what’s going on in the moment,” she adds.
Debbie Kennedy, “Mimi” to her grandchildren, spends two days a week with her Medina-area grandchildren, Jackson, 5 and Davis, 3 ½. It’s a treasured time for the grandmother who makes fun a priority. Two others live in Pennsylvania.
“In place of gifts I try to have gifts of experiences with them,” Kennedy says. She and her husband buy Akron Zoo passes for the boys each year. Regular outings to the local library to see a guinea pig, picnic lunches at a park, trips to the Cleveland Museum of Natural History and simple walks together build memories.
“I’m very lucky because these two little guys are perfect. I guess that’s a grandma talking,” she says. “There’s something magical. You can ignore everything else and you just want to take those hugs and kisses.”
Macek says it’s possible to develop into a fun grandparent, even if it doesn’t come naturally.
“I don’t know if someone needs to go against who they are as a grandparent,” she says. Try keeping classic games around the house to play if that suits your personality. Silly games like Twister and Don’t Spill the Beans are popular choices for more rambunctious play.
“If you’re not (naturally silly) it’s going to be exhausting because you’re putting effort into being something you’re not. It’s not a competition. Kids are good at seeing things. Be genuine by being yourself.”
Marie Elium hopes to continue her family’s legacy of fun grandparenting when she becomes a grandmother this month.
