Make Room for Positivity

LIFE SPACES

Happy Matters
Make Room for Positivity

By Tracy McBride

As parents, we knew who our kids hung out with and discouraged relationships with troublemakers. We knew that if our kids spent time with smokers or drinkers there was a high probability they’d do it, too.

Today, with many of us grandparents and retirees, this pattern of influence is still worthy of our attention. Who we surround ourselves with affects our mindset, attitude, health and confidence.

Influences
Self-awareness is a great gift if you use it. It took me a while, but I eventually grew to understand what energized or drained me. Those people or activities can be different as we move through stages of life.

While I can be very social and attend many events, I realized after a few hours of multiple conversations that I was exhausted and bored and needed time alone at home to recharge. I stopped attending back-to-back events, and worked with one client daily. I’m happiest when I protect my energy.

In evaluating my life and my relationships, I wanted to focus on having fun, being myself, and laughing. Each new year, I chose a word or phrase to keep me in check and focused. For several years in a row, it was Go with the Flow because I’m not only a Type-A person but at the time, I was also experiencing significant life changes that were beyond my control. My 2024 word is Streamline as I strive for simplicity.

Once I leaned into the belief that happiness is an inside job, I was released from what others around me did or said. When negative people spewed their negativity, it was about them, not me. We all have life situations that we can let drag us down, but we can choose not to become victims of them. Instead, I look for the silver lining in every situation and surround myself with others who do the same; they help me see the silver lining when I can’t.

NEO Boomer magazine’s theme for this issue explores love and laughter. Here are ways I’ve found both. Maybe a few will work for you, too.

• Children. Kids indeed keep you young. I am blessed to see my grandkids weekly and immerse myself in them—no emails or calls when they are here. We play games, go on walks, color and cook. Attending their sporting events on weekends is my happy place.
• Friends. I enjoy shared experiences with a close circle of friends or family. Recently, I invited our nieces, both in their 20s, for a tea party with us. Listening to what is going on in their lives without judgment and hearing how they are adulting is refreshing. Planning lunch with a close friend is a perfect opportunity to get gussied up and enjoy each other’s company.
• Exercise. Going to gyms to work out isn’t my thing, but “rebounding,” or moving energetically, has its health benefits. I listen to ’70s dance music as I bounce and sing out loud. It lifts my mood.
• Environment. I’m joyful and creative when I decorate and tweak my living spaces. Changing and moving the furniture and artwork makes me happy.
• Clothes. Dressing in my power colors is energizing and influences the people I attract. Wearing all black drains me, and I feel invisible. Color is fun when mixing unexpected combinations like hot pink and red. Bright nail polish is my go-to for fun.
• Social media. Instagram accounts that reinforce my beliefs or that promote positive aging encourage me to live creatively. One place to try: Instagram @advancedstyle.

Keep this in mind: Rod Stewart is still touring at 78; he surrounds himself with all ages and has the stamina to rock for hours. He dresses youthfully, doesn’t follow stereotypes, mixes prints, wears bold colors and shows a lot of chest hair.

Another positive influencer is style icon and designer,102-year-old Iris Apfel. A bold dresser, she has a Barbie made in her image, and designs collections for H&M clothing and floor coverings for Ruggable. Some of her quotes include, “More is more and less is a bore.” “When you don’t dress like everybody else, you don’t have to think like everybody else.” “If you’re lucky enough to get old, I think you should celebrate it.”

Surround yourself with youth, joy and love; positivity is contagious.