Please welcome Boomer’s newest blogger, Tim Lybarger, founder and Director of Programming for Encore NEO, a not-for-profit organization dedicated to ‘helping inspired individuals craft meaningful careers and satisfying lifestyles for the second halves of their lives.’ Tim works with individuals in transition to help them create new careers around the interests that inspire them. Building on a 30-year career in Organizational and Personal Development, Tim also has an individual practice with The Encore Careerist that focuses on strategies for working and living toward the goal of a remarkable 100-year life. This blog is about our internal dialogues related to aging (internal ageism) and how we have the power to significantly improve the quality of our later-lives by focusing our attention on possibility over limitation.
Our Perceptions About Aging Impact Our Quality of Life
By Tim Lybarger
Who do you see in the image – a young woman or an old woman?
Take a closer look. The single picture contains both images. And each image has the power to elicit startlingly different narratives in our imaginations.
What is like to be old? Or young? To which do you choose to relate most? Why?
The 100-Year Life
Despite Covid-19 and the opioid crisis, the overall trend line is unmistakable. We are living longer. Almost all of us know of someone who has breached the century mark. Just this morning, I read in the news of Ann Douglas, widow of the actor Kirk Douglas, dying at age 102. Kirk himself died in in 2020 at the age of 103.
The number of centenarians in the U.S. grew from over 53,000 in 2010 to over 90,000 in 2020. By 2030, there will most likely be over 130,000 centenarians in the U.S.
So, how do you think about aging?
Sarah (not her real name) was in an assisted-living facility for rehab after getting a hip replaced. She’d been down this road before with the other hip a few years earlier, so she knew what to expect. On one of my visits to her, I noticed she seemed to avoid interaction with the other residents. Though many were obviously quite ill and confined to their beds, this was still something unusual for Sarah, the very social extrovert that she is. Asking about it, her answer was blunt, “These are just a bunch of old people waiting to die. That’s not who I am. I need to get out of here and get back on my treadmill.”
Though I was taken aback by her uncharacteristically cold demeaner, I couldn’t deny that her firm personal convictions had worked for her. Today, at 93, Sarah still lives independently, by herself. She gets up early every morning and drives her car to the local gym where she ‘gets back on her treadmill.’ She also reads several books a week to keep her mind sharp.
Yes, she faces limitations that force sacrifices, but she doesn’t succumb easily and she is determined to focus on what she can do — not what she can’t.
The Social Mirror and Our Power of Choice
Over the past century, much of our society has evolved attitudes and language related to aging that emphasize loss and decline rather than growth and possibility. That is tragic. But it’s also not my problem.
What is my problem is the set of personal attitudes I develop about my own potential — despite my age — and the actions that I take to make the very most of each and every day of my life.
How do I look beyond the limitations to see the possibilities? Am I in it for life — all of it?
Now, those are great questions.
Stayed tuned for more to come. Meanwhile, let’s get back on our treadmills.
Image courtesy illusionsindex.org
