EDITOR’S NOTE
Hollywood relies on sequels to squeeze storylines and money from movies that were good the first time around. Some work. I’m thinking of “The Godfather, Part II,” for example. Others miss the mark. If you’ve seen “Jaws the Revenge,” you know what I’m talking about.
Dating in your 50s and older resembles a movie sequel with occasional hits and plenty of misses. The characters are familiar, but they’re thrown into different situations. A lot can happen between sequels; sometimes it’s not worth the hassle of threading the pieces together. The backstories require too much explanation to drag into the next film or relationship.
Take Two
I like movies, but I’m not sure I’d like dating today, mostly because I wasn’t particularly good at it in high school and my 20s when life and expectations were simpler. I spent my senior prom night with three girlfriends, eating Chef Boyardee pizza from a kit and listening to albums on the living room stereo console. That I didn’t have a date—this was 1978—surprised no one at the time or today when I bring it up to friends during the occasional high school-was-miserable/wonderful (teller’s choice) conversations.
Back then, my mom, in her well-intentioned but potentially psychologically damaging way, identified the problem: me. Boys don’t like girls who “act too smart.” I studiously avoided science classes in high school, so she was right about the acting part. What I lacked in brains I made up for in self-confidence. I ignored her advice and its implications, saving thousands in therapy bills.
A few months after graduating from college in 1982, I went on my last first date and married the guy four years later. We’ve been together ever since, and the curtain firmly closed on my dating scene. I didn’t give the topic much thought until I became editor of Northeast Ohio Boomer magazine. Dating is the second-most requested story topic I get from readers (how to make friends is number one).
I’ve read about late-in-life dating, tiptoed into the dating world—story-wise—and heard countless stories from people about how tough it is out there. They want to date but are unsure how to get started.
We revisit dating in this issue of the magazine. If nothing else, we point out the complexities of dating after 55. There’s a saying that potential dating partners are looking for a nurse or a purse, a cynical but in some cases an accurate way of summarizing the situation.
I encountered bright spots, too. The matchmaker and dating coach I interviewed brought hardy optimism to their work and I was buoyed by their comments. I also talked to people who’ve had good luck dating, both online and by happenstance; one couple left on a cross-country hiking trip last week.
Aside from dating, we cover lots of other topics in this issue, ranging from outer space to the outdoors. The eclipse on April 8 should be exciting and, being a solar eclipse, dark. I’ve got the special glasses and I’m prepared to be celestially impressed.
Our story about camping is a primer for people like me who aren’t inclined to sleep outdoors. I’ve given camping a lot of chances over the years and, until recently, I’d rather rewatch “Jaws the Revenge” than spend another night sleeping on the ground.
Thanks to the camping story, I’m rethinking my anti-smoky fire, sleeping-on-rocks bias. I’m up for a “Godfather II”-like sequel experience. With a nod to my late mom, I’m smart enough or act smart enough to know that a shark with a grudge is no competition for a night under the stars, as long as I’m better prepared this time around. A mobster beats a monster every time.
