A Special Remembrance on St. Patrick’s Day
My family’s Irish roots proudly run deep. Actually, the O’Connor clan includes the last High Kings of Ireland. My father used to tell us that and I thought it was just more Irish blarney. Turns out he was correct. Parents usually are.
In the Irish tradition, there’s a land we all love, known as Tír na nÓg, which loosely translates in English to “Land of Eternal Youth.” For lay people, it’s the place where children of Irish heritage go to live forever young when they pass away from the physical world.
We’ve all somehow found a way to deal with this type of loss though I doubt I will ever truly understand the pain the parents and family members endure with the passing of a child. We of Irish stock take comfort in knowing that the children we love, who have left us, will rest comfortably in Tír na nÓg and always remain as they were when they left us … as the children we knew and loved.
We have some good friends who had to go through this horrible experience when their teenage son passed away after a serious surgery. He was a delightful little guy and was loved by all everywhere; at school, at church, the ski slopes, the basketball court, the golf course, and anyplace else people were gathering for fun. He and our youngest son were very good buds since they were kindergarteners. His sister was in our son Sean’s class and is the subject of the Graduation Rainbow story.
Our little guy had a great sense of humor, a clever Irish wit, and a confidence about life that we all learned from. He was always upbeat, even though he easily could have felt sorry for himself given the hand he was dealt. He was a comfort and inspiration to us all … still is.
At his funeral mass, Sue and I were asked to deliver eulogies. Sue was his teacher in second grade. I was his friend. We both shared, painful though it was, our thoughts about our friend, how much he meant to us, how much we would miss him and how much we treasured the time we spent together with him. As is often the case at funeral masses, there was a mixed feeling of joy, sadness, relief, hope and hopelessness.
Everyone struggled through the mass, and as part of my comments, I mentioned that we could all take comfort in knowing our little guy was resting peacefully in Tír na nÓg. After sharing a few more thoughts and memories, we recited the Irish blessing together and prepared for his final departure.
After the mass, his parents took Sue and me aside for a moment to share a thought with us. They told us their son had written a report for his freshman English class shortly before he passed away. The focus of his essay was the mythical Irish land of Tír na nÓg. They also informed us that his freshman English teacher was at the funeral mass. I guess there’s a reason why we have Tír na nÓg. May the road continue to rise to meet you, Dylan.
Epilogue: It’s been 22 years since Dylan’s passing. We all still think of him often and remember him fondly. We recall some of the funny things he said and the fun we had together. Our son is now married with three beautiful daughters. Dylan’s sister is also married and has twins; a boy and a girl. His dad passed away a few years ago. His mom lives near her daughter and helps out with the twins. One of the twins looks very much like his uncle Dylan.
