As you stand in your kitchen, with the phone on speaker and one hand leaning against the counter, while using the other hand to sort through a stack of documents (school papers, medical records, an old grocery receipt), someone you love is saying how wonderful it would be to be able to see each other all the time because you are located near each other. You can hear the warmth in their voice. And you can hear the underlying question.
Are You Able To Make This Work?
It is easy enough to see why someone would want to move closer to family. The appearance of moving closer to family can give you a sense of safety and proximity to loved ones. For example, many families will picture themselves having Sunday dinners together, making it simpler for parents to take care of children on a daily basis; grandparents have more opportunities to spend time with the grandkids, or help an aging parent. The softness of this vision, however, hides a much harsher financial reality.
The Move Is More Than Just The Move Day
It is simple to initially consider just the apparent expenditures associated with a relocation. Packing materials. Gasoline. A rental truck. Taking time away from work. Obtaining quotes from the best local movers so that you can compare whether hiring assistance or doing the work by yourself makes better financial sense.
Although these expenditures do matter, they represent merely the entryway into a larger and more detailed financial picture.
Typically, a family relocation affects virtually every aspect of a household’s budget. Additional charges for setting up services such as electricity, gas, water, and internet. Fees for enrolling children in schools. Charges for temporary storage. Pet transportation. Cleaning costs. Repairs are required prior to vacating the previous location. If you are selling a house, additional costs include paying an agent commission, potential inspection issues, and the period of time following a relocation that exists until your funds are fully disbursed. The actual process of relocating may take only a couple of days. However, the financial impact can continue for several months.
Potential Changes To Your Daily Expenses
While there are potential savings associated with residing near family members, when making this decision, it is important to consider the positive and negative aspects. In most cases, for example, you will save money on traveling, babysitting, emergency trips, or paying for an overnight hotel stay. Additionally, eating meals with each other and supporting one another can provide a feeling of stability in everyday life.
It also requires the objective evaluation of the new area (ie, how much would your grocery bills be higher?). How long will your commute be? Will your property tax, rent, insurance premium, school-related costs, or utility bill be higher/lower than what you pay now? These small changes in your monthly budget can ultimately have a large effect on your overall budget over time.
Family Support Has Real Value, But It Also Requires Establishing Boundaries
One of the primary motivations for individuals and families to relocate closer to family is due to increased levels of support. Possibly, your parents can assist with transporting your children to and from school. Perhaps you can assist a sibling with providing caregiver support. Perhaps both parties envision a more interconnected lifestyle.
In addition to providing emotional support, assistance provided by family members offers economic benefits. Assistance can potentially lessen the number of hours spent working as a paid caregiver. Assistance can offer greater flexibility in your work schedule. It can lessen the level of stress experienced in managing multiple responsibilities independently.
Support does require establishing clear boundaries to prevent misunderstandings and/or conflict in relationships.
Boundaries include:
- Who is assisting with what tasks?
- Frequency of assistance?
- Monetary involvement?
- Do you anticipate contributing to shared family expenses?
- Do you expect to transport family members more frequently?
- Do you anticipate hosting visitors more often?
- Do you anticipate becoming the “go-to” resource for family member emergencies?
Establishing clear boundaries regarding support is not unkind or unemotional. On the contrary, establishing clear boundaries protects relationships from developing resentments silently over time.
Financial Income Changes Must Be Given Thought
Even though your current employment continues unchanged and you are able to perform your duties remotely, there may be unforeseen aspects regarding your relocation. Can your employer dictate where you live? Will taxes change? Will travel requirements change? Will reliable access to high-speed internet change? Will your workspace change?
Additionally, if you lose your job and need to locate a new position in the vicinity of your relocated residence, the challenges facing you will be significantly heightened.
In addition to moving closer to loved ones, you are essentially entering a completely different economic landscape. Salary ranges may be lower. Job markets may be slower. Insurance programs/benefits may differ. If you operate a business, your customer base, suppliers, and shipping/delivery areas may change.
Before committing to relocate, create a simplified representation of your projected income for the next three months versus your projected expenses. Include a buffer for unexpected expenses. This simple task may cause discomfort; nevertheless, this exercise can provide a safeguard against making a beautiful decision under extreme pressure. Emotional factors can add value to the decision-making process as well.
Provide Enough Time Before Making A Permanent Move.
In order to better consider everyday yet important issues regarding your potential or planned move, take a little time to ask yourself these questions (in addition to any others):
- Will I be able to cover the first three months?
- Are there one-time costs, and/or are there expenses that I will incur repeatedly?
- Did we clearly define the level of assistance expected from family members in terms of providing financial support?
- What would happen if I am unable to find work/housing for childcare?
These questions, however, will allow you to keep the emotional components of moving alive, but will also give you a way to contain them.
